nuderefsarebest:

drtanner:

Like Idris Elba, for example. I can’t think of a single Chuck Norris joke that couldn’t be far better applied to Idris Elba.

• THERE USED TO BE A STREET NAMED AFTER IDRIS ELBA BUT THEY HAD TO RENAME IT BECAUSE NO ONE CROSSES IDRIS ELBA AND LIVES.
• IDRIS ELBA AND SUPERMAN ONCE FOUGHT EACH OTHER FOR A BET. THE LOSER HAD TO START WEARING HIS UNDERWEAR ON THE OUTSIDE OF HIS PANTS.
• SOME MAGICIANS CAN WALK ON WATER. IDRIS ELBA CAN SWIM THROUGH LAND.
• IDRIS ELBA CAN SLAM A REVOLVING DOOR.
• DEATH ONCE HAD A NEAR-IDRIS ELBA EXPERIENCE.
• IDRIS ELBA IS IMMUNE TO HEART ATTACKS. HIS HEART ISN’T NEARLY FOOLISH ENOUGH TO ATTACK HIM.
• IDRIS ELBA CAN WIN A GAME OF CONNECT FOUR IN THREE MOVES.
• WHEN IDRIS ELBA DOES A PRESS-UP, HE ISN’T LIFTING HIMSELF UP. HE’S PUSHING THE EARTH DOWN.

Try to tell me this shit isn’t better with Idris Elba.

You can’t. Because it is.

ineptshieldmaid:

star-anise:

Yeah sure Tumblr is a hellsite but I know someone who wrote a fanfic in the 1990s that someone else didn’t like, so when she was selling printed copies of the zine with the story in it out of her hotel room at a convention, this other woman STOOD IN FRONT OF HER DOOR TO REFUSE PEOPLE ACCESS. Because the story featured a ship she disliked. And I feel like somehow, 10,000 Tumblrs still can’t compare to that level of Extra.

Your periodic reminder that the technology and the scale of distribution changes, the basic impulse to fandom wank does not

spacebumble:

emily brontë

suggestion: be a recluse with a foul temper, wander the moors without a bonnet, shadowed by your mastiff dog, and be so eccentric the people of your village assume that, although you are the minister’s daughter, you are a particular kind of witch